Adam Kinzinger, the former Republican Representative turned unwitting dancing monkey for the Democrat party, is many things. Bright isn’t one of them.
So when he released an ad urging voters in New Hampshire to stop Donald Trump from winning the GOP primary there, we’re certain he thought he was helping the lone candidate who has a glimmer of hope of doing so – Nikki Haley.
Instead, Haley had to be watching this masterclass in “How Not to Inspire Voters” in absolute horror.
Kinzinger released an ad complete with a zip-up turtleneck and a fake background of New Hampshire – allegedly – in which he pleads with Republicans and Independents to send “Trump to defeat.”
“Is there anything that will make you smile bigger than sending Trump to defeat?” he said with all the feeling of a Stuart Smalley affirmation. “This is a once-in-a-lifetime chance. Your vote in the primary matters more than ever. Imagine his orange face turning bright red when he realizes he wouldn’t even make it to the general election.”
There's a bright future ahead, New Hampshire! It's time to make history and turn Trump's orange face red in this GOP primary. Your vote is powerful – it's our chance to switch channels on 8 years of this dangerous, weak, sniveling Trump show. #StopTrump #NHPrimary pic.twitter.com/VDgjhrRDbx
— Adam Kinzinger (Slava Ukraini) 🇺🇸🇺🇦🇮🇱 (@AdamKinzinger) January 21, 2024
RELATED: Adam Kinzinger’s New Book ‘Renegade’ Will Be Released in October
Kinzinger’s Embarrassing Effort
Is it any wonder how this guy went from being a congressman to a benchwarmer contributor for CNN that they only call on when they expressly need somebody whose only goal in life is to defeat Donald Trump?
Nothing quite says “Come follow me, New Hampshirites!” like a guy clearly enjoying the comforts of indoor heating as he green screens a snowy Granite State scene behind him.
What a rube!
As further evidence that nobody in New Hampshire takes Kinzinger seriously, he had to run an op-ed column in the Portsmouth Herald, the 15th largest newspaper in the state with a circulation of under 10,000.
“Three years ago, if you had told me Donald Trump would be the frontrunner in the Republican primary, I would not have believed you,” Kinzinger writes. “At that time, I might have wagered that Trump would either be confined in a jail cell or isolated at Mar-A-Lago, with the Republican Party having decisively turned its back on him.”
Fantasies of Trump in prison. Fantasies of Trump’s orange face. Kinzinger should probably pay a visit to Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s therapist, posthaste.
Responses Are Brutal
We’re sure that there are plenty of people out there who side with Kinzinger, but very few of them showed up in the replies to his new ad. In fact, most of those who responded were absolutely brutal in their mocking of the former congressman.
“You’re not a Congressman anymore,” one individual wrote. “You do appear to be a feckless flamingo, though.”
I think I saw Feckless Flamingo open for The Flaming Lips back in 1992. Where does the time go?
“Way to hang in there and attempt to keep relevant Adam. No one is listening to you,” added SixPack, a self-described “politically incorrect conservative.”
“Why do you do this to yourself?” writes Mike Leach. “You know you’re going to get mocked into orbit. And yet, here you are.”
“Imagine thinking this would HELP Haley lol,” added Will Upton, junior editor for The National Pulse.
That’s a claim we actually ran by our fact-checkers here at The Political Insider and they determined it to be “mostly true.” It would have been “completely true,” but they felt that would be an insult to dorks.
Salty Texan asked, “How much Democrat money you taking?”
This is a good question considering Kinzinger’s Country First PAC raised over $2.2 million during the 2024 election cycle and donated all $5,000 of the maximum contribution to former New Jersey Governor Chris Christie, who had absolutely no chance of stopping Trump.
Country First still has nearly $2 million on hand. It’s almost like they’re saving the bulk of it for the general election rather than the primary, which, you would think if you’re a true Republican outfit that simply opposes Trump, would have been your main focus.
They did spend over $445,000 on “strategy and research” and “media,” which ultimately culminated in the ad you saw above. Perhaps a refund is in order.
When he isn’t making cringeworthy videos, Kinzinger is acting in other ways to discredit his entire career, doing things like crying during the January 6th committee hearings and then hawking autographed copies of their final report online for just $100. Oh, and that whole CNN gig in which he was hired for hours after his House career ended.
Kinzinger recently lost his mind when Senator Mike Lee (R-UT) suggested that the committee be investigated after footage from the Capitol riot of 2021 countering their narrative came to light.
Several clips showed Capitol police clearing a path for those walking through the halls of the site where the congressman and his Democrat colleagues contend an “insurrection” took place.
Kinzinger replied by saying those who doubt the committee are “zombies … for an ugly orange fatso.”
Give Ocasio-Cortez a call, Adam. We’re sure she’ll give you the number of her therapist.
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